Most of us know what it is like to overthink. We replay a conversation that finished hours ago and think about what we should have said. We worry about something that might happen next week, imagine different outcomes or spend far too much time wondering what somebody else might be thinking.
Often, we are perfectly aware that we are doing it. We may even recognise that thinking about the situation isn’t helping, yet telling ourselves to ‘stop worrying’ rarely seems to work. So why can overthinking be so difficult to switch off?
Why do we overthi
nk?
Our brains are extremely good at looking for potential problems. Being able to anticipate danger, remember previous threats and prepare for what might happen next has obvious evolutionary advantages. The problem is that this protective system can also become involved in the ordinary pressures and uncertainties of modern life.
A difficult conversation at work, an upcoming appointment, money worries, family problems, an unanswered message or a concern about what somebody thinks of us can all become things that our mind decides require further attention. We think about the problem in an attempt to resolve it, but sometimes we simply end up thinking about it again and again.
This repetitive thinking is often described as ‘rumination’. Rather than leading us towards a solution, it can keep our attention firmly focused on the problem and contribute to feelings of stress and anxiety.
Overthinking, anxiety and the stress bucket
In Solution Focused Hypnotherapy, we often use the metaphor of a ‘stress bucket’ to explain how life’s pressures can accumulate. Different experiences add to the bucket throughout the day. Some may be significant, while others are relatively minor, but together they can begin to have an impact on how we feel.
Our thoughts can contribute to this too. Worrying repeatedly about something that hasn’t happened yet can make us feel anxious in the present, while continually revisiting something that has already happened can keep the associated feelings very much alive.
When we are experiencing a lot of stress, we may notice that we become more irritable, anxious or overwhelmed. Sleep can become more difficult, concentration can suffer and situations that we might normally manage quite easily can suddenly seem much harder.
The stress bucket is a useful way of thinking about this accumulation. It isn’t a literal description of what happens inside the brain, but it can help us recognise why reducing stress and changing some of our patterns of thinking can make such a difference.
The difference between thinking and problem-solving
Thinking about a problem isn’t necessarily the same as solving it. Useful problem-solving tends to move us towards something we can actually do: What is within my control? What could help? What is the next small step I can take?
Overthinking tends to take us back around the same familiar circuit. We ask ourselves what might go wrong, why something happened, what somebody else meant or what will happen if things don’t work out as we hope.
That distinction is important: one type of thinking can move us towards action and change; the other can leave us repeatedly examining a problem without getting any closer to resolving it.
Can Solution Focused Hypnotherapy help with overthinking?
Solution Focused Hypnotherapy takes a different approach. Rather than spending session after session analysing everything that has gone wrong, we focus much more on what you would like to be different, what is already working and the small changes that could begin moving things in the direction you want.
This doesn’t mean ignoring genuine problems or simply trying to ‘think positively’. Instead, we begin to direct attention towards possibilities, resources and solutions.
What would you notice if things were beginning to improve? What are you already doing that helps? When have you coped well with something similar before? What small change could make tomorrow slightly better?
These questions give us somewhere different to place our attention. Combined with hypnosis and relaxation, Solution Focused Hypnotherapy aims to support people in developing more helpful patterns of thinking and behaviour and make positive changes in their everyday lives.
Moving from overthinking towards change
There will always be things outside our control. We cannot change yesterday, know exactly what somebody else is thinking or guarantee what will happen next week. What we can influence is what we do next.
Sometimes the first step is simply recognising that we are travelling around the same thought again and bringing our attention back to something we can influence in the present.
Change doesn’t always begin with finding the perfect answer to a problem. Sometimes it begins with creating a little space between what has happened, the thoughts that follow and what we choose to do next.
And perhaps that space is more important than we realise.
Solution Focused Hypnotherapy with The Space In Between
At The Space In Between, I offer Solution Focused Hypnotherapy to adults and young people who may be experiencing anxiety, stress, overthinking, sleep difficulties, low confidence and a range of other issues.
If overthinking or anxiety is getting in the way of how you would like to feel or live, an initial consultation gives us an opportunity to talk about how Solution Focused Hypnotherapy works, what you would like to change and whether it feels like the right approach for you.